Welcome to the panem et circenses of my site. This is, sadly, pretty much the entire reason for the site's existence at this point. None of this stuff is what you'd call well-formed literature. None of it ground-breaking or revelation bearing anymore. None of it will ever make me famous. I pretty much just get bored and chatter about nothing. Enjoy.

NEW

Congratulations on Your Job, Asshole
I'm Deleting You From My Contacts
Dear Fat People, Please Stop Doing That

The Dating Wasteland

Part 1 of the Dating Wasteland Series
Part 2 of the Dating Wasteland Series
Part 3 of the Dating Wasteland Series
Part 4 of the Dating Wasteland Series
Part 5 of the Dating Wasteland Series
How To Succeed In Breaking Up Without Really Trying
So You Want to Keep Your Boyfriend
So You Want To Keep Your Girlfriend
What She Really Means Is
The Pre-Chick Inspection
How to Let The Man Go
He Likes You - Maybe
You Should Hate Commitment!
How to Keep Your Man Happy Forever
My Boyfriend Likes You, So You Must Die

Sex, and The Practical Guide To Being Nasty

Stick Your Face In His Crotch!
Stick Your Face In Her Crotch!
Hey Ladies, Wax Your Cooch!
Hey Ladies, Clean Your Cooch!
Hey Fellas, Shave Your Sack!

Stupid People

Please Reinforce Your Obvious Superiority
Buried, Not Married
Do Fat Girls Have Thin Days?
Hopefully, that's your final answer
I've never felt this way before (and other dumb things men say)
I am nobody
Everyone who uses FrontPage is Stupid
Everyone on irc is Stupid
Stupid Chain Emails
Hello, I'm Stupid
Psycho Angels
Why Don't You Go Fuck Yourself Asshole
Canadians are Boring (no exceptions)
You're Right, Nobody Likes You!
Wacky Tacky Outfit Friday
There's No 'I' in 'Team'
This Is Bullshit
Hey, It's a Penis
Things for Women Not To Say During Sex
Watch As I Shove Large Objects Up My Ass
Sleep With a Nerd, Secure Your Future!
Sex and the Stupid People

Sheeple

When Will the 'Minorities' Stop Fucking Whining
Allow Me
Da Da Da
Gas prices are high, whine whine, you asses
Daily affirmation for a loser
Appearances Matter
Dr. Laura is Fucking Insane
Celebrities Suck My Ass
You're Going to Hell
Why People Suck the Big Nad
Get off my welcome mat
Miss Manners Can Eat Me
Show Me Your Tommy
The Information Superdriveway
No, I don't hate everything
Process of Elimination

Society

At the Movies
You Don't Deserve Shit
Allow me
Y2 Get the Fuck Over it
I Care. Really!
Men Have No Rights (and this should change)
Prostitutes: Your Friend and Mine
It's Not Our Fault
Making sense of senseless publicity
Random Bitch Fodder
Go Outside and Drive
Return of the Good Guy
The Mystery of Uterine America
Smile if you Hate It
A Smoke...My Firstborn for a Smoke
Sponsered by Boo Berry cereal
Spank You
Vote for Me or Die
Consumer Alert
Feral Cheryl
The Ped File

Warning
This section is not suitable for political fence riders, hippies, wannabe hippies, those who have embraced communism, country music fans, those who are overly sensitive to everyone's feelings and would like to teach the world to sing, people who can read, and/or anyone who plans on attending that pro-life rally later today. Personally, I think if you are so 'pro-life' you should go get one of your own and stay out of mine, but that is a rant for another day. You will be offended, so please leave now. If you choose to stay, do not send me hate mail informing me of the fact that you were offended. I have just said you would be, so spare me your sensitivity speeches and various other trite words of wisdom. All writings, pics, and any content copyrighted to me, Alice, and any other use without my permission will wind up with you in court. Many cute, furry animals were harmed during the writing of these txts which are, incidentally, about 5 years old.